Guys, don't go out to dinner tonight!

For crying out loud people, don't go out to dinner tonight!  Don't buy an eighty dollar bouquet of roses!  Don't buy a fifty dollar box of Godiva chocolates.  According to the National Retail Federation, the average individual will spend $119.67 on Valentine's Day.  Not couple, individual.  Men, of course, spend more on this day, an average of $156.22, versus an average of $85.08 for women.  That's $241.30 per couple!  Oh the madness.  Look, you can still be romantic without blowing your budget.  Guys, if you want to give your ladies a romantic meal, flowers and candies, I'll show you how to do it for under fifty bucks.

1. Instead of going out to a crowded restaurant and either waiting two hours, or making reservations five months in advance for the privilege of being forced their "prix-fixe" menu, make a nice dinner at home.  Seriously guys, women love it when you cook.  If you don't know how to cook, don't get overly ambitious.  Your woman already knows that you can't cook.  ANY attempt (think spaghetti with sauce out of a jar, brownies from a box mix) will win you MAJOR points.  More on this below.
2. Get your flowers at Home Depot.  Whatever you do, do NOT go to your local florist or internet florist and spend $80 for a dozen roses.  You can get the same thing at Home Depot for about twelve bucks.
3. Skip the Godivas or other high end fancy chocolates.  Remember the conversation heart candies?  Little chalky candies with phrases such as "be mine" or "kiss me" printed on them.  It's cute, it's playful.  Way better than a $50 box of chocolates.
4. Do you really have to give gifts?  If you followed my advice above: made a romantic dinner at home, gave her flowers purchased from the Home Depot, and spent the night laughing over the cute phrases on the heart candies, you're done.  What are you going to bust out a tennis bracelet after all this?

More on the home cooked meal thing.

• The setting.  All the usual trappings.  Use the best silverware and flatware that you own.  Don't go out buying a bunch of new stuff.  That defeats the purpose.  Again, you're significant other knows what stuff you own.  She'll be happy to see you using the good stuff, even if it's the chipped hand-me-downs from Mom.  Get some candles.  Tall ones for the table.  A few votives strewn about elsewhere.  Set the table before she gets there.  If you live together, kick her out for a few hours.  Make it a surprise if possible.  Have a friend drag her out and get her home on time.
• If you have roommates, you'll need to work with them.  If they are in relationships, they will likely be going out, thus staying out of your way.  If not, kick them out.  If you live with a decent human being, this shouldn't be a problem.
• The food.  Again, she already knows that you can't cook.  If you can, you don't need my help.  If you can't try this...
• Salad.  Get a bad of mixed green salad from your grocer's produce department.  Add some walnuts, cherry tomatoes cut in half, one small apple cut in small wedges (put three slices per salad), and a handful of grapes cut in half.  Add your favorite bottle of Paul Newman's salad dressing, and you have an instant Waldorf salad.  Total cost, maybe eight bucks.
• Entree.  I'm serious about the spaghetti.  Boil some noodles.  In a small sauce pan, brown a small amount of ground beef, dump in a jar of your favorite sauce, and add parmesan cheese to your liking.  That's it.  Get some ready made garlic bread if you like.  Total cost, maybe another eight bucks.
• Dessert.  Get a box of Betty Crocker cupcake mix and white frosting.  Make the cupcakes according to the directions, after they cool, add frosting, and put two of your conversational candy hears on each cupcake.  Make sure the phrases on the cupcake that you give to your significant other are appropriate.  Total cost, what five bucks?

That's it.  Enjoy.  You just gave your lady a romantic dinner, flowers and candy on Valentine's Day for under fifty bucks.

Comments

[BD]

Not to be a grammar freak but it's "prix fixe" not "pre-fixe". It means fixed price in French.

http://www.answers.com/prix+fixe

[lamoneyguy]

Thanks BD, I'm usually a grammar freak myself. I knew this was wrong when I typed it, just didn't bother to look it up. I'll fixe it above. :)

[HC]

While I generally agree with this advice, and while it's too late anyway, let me say:

Those chalky candy hearts taste awful and leave residue everywhere. Unless your SO adores kitsch beyond all measure, SKIP THEM.

Go to Trader Joe's, Target, or somewhere where you can get high-cacao, single-origin chocolate bars. Buy two or three of them. Tie them up with a ribbon. It will run you maybe $9, and make you look like you have good taste.

If that's still too much, I second the brownies. Dress them up by adding nuts or adding chocolate chips (either directly into the batter, or melted and glazed over the top).

[Bronco]

LAMG, I agree with you on the dinner at home plan. I have been doing this one for years. SVD is always the worst day to go out: crowded and over-priced. Make dinner for your lady and she will appreciate it more and you don't have to pay the insane SVD prices. Usually I get a nice gift as well, ie jewelry, but this year I painted a picture instead-- more personal and saves a ton of dough.

[Wes]

Doh! You post is about two days too late! That's when I made reservations for two to my fiancee's favorite high end restaurant. Bottome line: $145. It was expensive but we had a great time. On the other hand, we probably would have had a great time at a modest mexican restaurant with a pitcher of margaritas.

As for equality between the sexes. Not so much... I was given a card and a bar of chocolate. It's the thought that counts! : )

[Ellen]

My sweetie and I actually have a different holiday than everyone else--it's called Discount Candy Day, and it's celebrated but three times a year. :D We like getting three-four times the amount of candy for the same price as less than a week previous, just by holding our horses.

But if you can't wait, here's a super-easy way to impress: homemade truffles. It's so easy, but so impressive: Melt chocolate; add an equal amount of warmed cream. Chill in fridge for a couple hours. When it holds form, roll it into balls, and coat with cocoa. Voila!

[natylite78]

We did a lot of this yesterday (even though I just saw the post today)! We actually cooked together, which we don't do to often. It was a lot of fun to share that. We set up the table with a tablecloth, candles etc. Even though he charred the steak and I bombed the creamed spinach, it was fun and romantic :)

[Charles]

Another alternative: plan a nice date for another day! My wife and I couldn't do much of anything yesterday (I was at work until 11pm). So, we are planning our time together for this Saturday. Prices will be back to normal, menus will be back to normal. (Since we cook for each other most every day, going out is the treat.)

[Sly Hoax]

Tell me about it!

We tried to go out to Macaroni Grill last night. What a nightmare! We waited TWO HOURS. When we finally managed to get a seat, they lied to us and said that they had called us four times. we were standing less than ten feet from the little booth that they stand at, so we knew that they were full of bull.

When we got to our table, we were both too upset (read: pissed) to eat. I wrote 'this sucks!' on the tablecloth (they use paper tablecloths and crayons) and we walked out.

Phooey!

[LivingAlmostLarge]

We never go out on V-Day. Last time must have been maybe our second year together. First year he was in such a rush to get home, DH slammed his finger in the car door and spent the evening in the ER (me I waited at home because at the time we didn't have cell phones).

Anyway though since then we hate going out to overpriced meals on the day. We usually go out either the weekend before or after. This year is no different. I think we're going to eat at home fondue. Which is not a cheap meal, but easy to make.